Finished Rewrite

I finally finished a ridiculous rewrite of a short I want to shoot this summer. I mean, this story has really changed shape. I'm not sure I've taken it in a "better" direction, but the characters have a much more realistic motivation than they did in the original.

It basically began as this southern Gothic like piece in which a little girl's imaginary friend must save her mother from an abusive father. The Gothic worked, but the characters, particulary the abusive father seemed a bit overdone and cliched to me. I couldn't tell what was making him abusive, and short of the usual alcoholic, resentful bastard shtick, I decided to rewrite him, which pointed to a rewrite of the tale. I resisted this, at first, because it was basically a true "revision" in the sense that it was almost not the same story. But I decided to go for it because my initial rewrite balooned the short into a 34 page monster far beyond my means of production. So, I killed the daughter - literally - and decided to focus on a present action - took the process to my college short story writing roots - FIND THE PRESENT ACTION.

It turned out as a story of a couple trying to move on after the loss of their daughter. The action actually begins on the day (two years after her death) that they try packing up her room. The daughter's ghost, upon hearing they intend to move on and try to restart their family, decides to haunt the mother (in a nice way) to prevent her from forgetting her. The father, however, cannot see the ghost, thinks his wife is losing it (or that he doesn't love his daughter enough to see her spirit) - and the story goes from there. Still have my doubts about about the pacing, as I might be cramming too much into 20 pages. But then again, I read it and think nothing really happens. I just don't know. My daughter likes it. Heather's listened to it, a lot. She'd tell me if she hated it. I think. But I'm setting it down for a month to write something else, something short and simple. Maybe I'll finish my Teenie Bop TV script that my daughter loves. But I want to write a short prose story, and I think I found the simple scene for it. It's a Raymond Carveresque tale that came to me this weekend.


It is a simple scene, based on a true story, of a man and woman moving in a heavy piece of furniture into their home while having a serious marital fight about a dead relative. Hope to make it five to seven pages and I may write it into a short script later. Haven't slapped much prose on paper in a while and was going through some old stuff, and man, I actually used to write all right.

Anyway...other bits...writing music recommendations - THEIVERY CORPORATION and FILLA BRAZILLA - trippy, sometimes Jazzy, sometimes hip-hoppy, always fresh world sounds...nice instrumentals, good for creating. Recommend hitting pandora.com and typing either of these names in.

Also finsihed an edit (actually months ago) on a Christian hip-hop vid for an artist doing great things for people in Downtown S-Town - that's Suffolk to the outsiders. His name's PT Rolla Mane, and the song is MOG (Man of God). Ch-ch-check it.

Teaching

I have put down my 12th graders' compare and contrast essays to indulge my jealousy of those on the various blog postings and their recent strides toward their dreams of writing for money. I too wish to write for money. It's supposedly bad to write that, I think, but let's face it - it would be much easier to justify sitting home in my office with the cat in my lap writing if I was actually getting paid to do it. At least my father-in-law would say so. As for me, my constant self guilt trip agrees. I am writing - a little. I'm mostly teaching others to write - or at least that's what I'm trying to do. However, I'm not sure I myself can write. Seems absurd, considering I've practiced it more than I've practiced anything in my life. Maybe that's why I'm so drawn to it. Maybe that's why while I'm driving, all I can think of is telling a story. Or when I hear a song I like, I only know I love it when I see a story under it or set to it. Maybe that's why when I don't get time to do it or do it on the level I want, I'm depressed. It's so damn hard and challenging, and to do it well is so subjective and illusive and shifting - it drives me mad.



Teaching is cool though. For my first year, I can tell it's something I will be good at. Will it make me happy? Sometimes it already does. But, sometimes it makes me so frustrated and resentful of what I perceive as wasted energy. For each student I inspire, I see nine who resent my efforts. Being face to face with the apathy that is eroding our culture is depressing. However, seeing the light turned on in that one, and being one of the people who helps throw the switch makes up for it. But, like I said, one in ten.



But, I've kept writing a bit. I'm on page 16 of a rewrite that I hope will only hit 20 pages. I've gone back to plot structure and motivation and making sure each character has opposing motives and goals. The first drafts of the short seemed gratuitous in certain ways, and I wanted more realism. So, I tried reimagining the story - reimagining it as a story with no bad guy - just somone who has a different goal than my protagonist - a worthy and understandable goal, but one that just doesn't jive with the main character's. Really need to have the draft done by New Years, so I can start picking it apart and planning to shoot it in the summer. We'll see.

More writing

I've been on a tear lately. Writing wise. I think the quality is there (in small amounts perhaps - they are all early drafts). But the quantity is definately there.

The short I just revised is moving in the right direction. I made it longer, which is an issue if I want to shoot it with my shaky production experience. I was going for shorter, but the writer in me is always like, "fuck your shaky production skills - shoot it when you're good. Or get fucking good NOW, you prick".

The writer in me is so John Blaze and the producer in my is so Eyore sometimes. But confidence comes with experience. Like having sex for the first time. There's a lot to take in. A lot to do and play with. You're in a rush. You're done. Poor poor job, hope you get a chance to do it again. That's how my first short went. I think everyone's first time's like that...right?

So I wrote it longer. It's still got a small cast, few locations, and good story.

I have also begun a tv script. Its a child/family story called Madison Avenue - about a girl and her dog and her dreams of being the next pop diva... This is quite a stray from my tendancy towards dark shit. Surprisingly, it's coming pretty well. Having fun with it at this point.

Still haven't gotten the huevos to rewrite Redmoon, but I read the Knucklehead's notes the other day and began confronting some tough decisions. It's a thriller/horror all mixed up with this drama-pseudo history plot. Got some good advice on it. Now just need to sit down and reenvision it.

Well, done with the break.

When it Rains...

July is to me what the sixties are to American history.

Usually turbulent, filled with crisis and sometimes, hope too.

For example, the first July we were open, Java limped to the six month mark, my house was nearly in foreclosure, we were staying in a house we were trying to fix and flip (which is hard when you haven't the money even to pay your own mortgage), and to top it off, my brother and I had a blow out about the coffee shop.
I thought we'd never speak again. (we do now, but it's not the same...won't ever be.)

Every July, sales lag, bills keep coming, and I usually wonder what I'll do with my life.

Last July, we nearly closed. Sales reached an all time low. Gas, and milk and coffee and all food really took a leap - which for a restaurant is no picnic.

This July, however, refused to adhere to that ugly trend. Despite the leap in gas prices, business has been steady. I finished another short script and have sent it out for notes (plan to spend next July shooting it).

AND I GOT A JOB!

My father sighs a huge gust of relief knowing I'll be "working for the man" as he puts it. I'll be teaching high school English at a local school - so the bills will be paid. I'll be using my degree for Christ's sake! Now I don't have to laugh every time I write those student loan checks.

I've got solid help at the shop. Looking to add one more to round out the crew, but stepping away is going more smoothly at this point than I'd imagined. I'm sure it will be a constant nagging (hopefully a profitable nagging), but it'll nag nevertheless.

In addition, I've nearly completed the first episode of The Adventures of Tone Loc - a reality mockumentary filmed in downtown Suffolk.

And if all that weren't plenty - I'm working on the 48hour film project with some killer people who will no doubt leave me with much more knowledge than I had before.

To the universe,
karma, God,
or whomever,
Thanks for this July. Just don't make me pay for it with an awful august.

Humbling Perspective

Watched Gangs of New York last night / this morning for the forth time in a month. This time with the director's commentary. Holy shit! Marty's a genius. Worked on the project 30 fucking years! He read probably 100 books just to develop this one story - not counting the other brilliant films he made in the meantime. Just so damn humbling to hear a master. His script saw probably 10 drafts from countless writers from the inception of the story to the production. The Knucklehead spoke of perspective in a few previous posts. I've never throught of my stories with even a tenth of the depth and dedication that Marty (and I call him Marty because we're that tight) has. After hearing the master's lecture last night, I have two choices. Sit down with everything I've "written" and rethink each character and pour myself into them and let them pour themselves out the way they should be onto the paper......or, take up rock climbing instead. Since I'm afraid of heights....where's my steno book?

Building a Legend

Well, that might be a slight overstatement...but who knows. Either way, this project is finally well underway. I've squared away a narrative structure ( I think), and have cut away all the dead footage. Still need to trim, work in transitions, layer audio, effects, music, sound, titles, format....yada yada yada. Basically all the fun stuff. This is the part I love most. Widdling it down this far can get mundane. Wading through the crap to get to the 90 min of stuff that's worth watching - can actually be like work. But cutting further and shaping into something you'd actaully (hopefully) want to watch, twice even, that's the shit, maine. But here's a funny little clip for dat ass.

Hello

Dave's return to the blog has inspired me to repost. Haven't done much (any) "writing", but still editing. Seems editing video (mostly music videos at this point) is my favorite thing to do. I think about writing and actually wrote a few poems (which I haven't done in about 2 years) the other weekend when I was down. But as far as developing new projects, shorts and things, I've fallen off. However, have made a few videos, and looking back over the year, I hadn't a one under my belt. Sad for a guy claiming to want to learn this art. But now, I've shot, wrote, cut, and published 12 actual videos. I know so much more about what I'm doing with a collection of clips, have a system down, and can have fun. Here's another racing video I just finished for a guy trying to break into professional racing. It's his promo, and it is my second paid project. (unless you cound the 8 gansta rap vids which you can check out on myspace.com/149films). I think it turned out well. Learned a shit load.

Also, finally got the studio version of a song for The Adventures of Tone Loc. It's a reality bit about a local celebrity with dreams of making it big...I've just begun taking notes on the clips. The camera work is decent considering I only had my camera for two weeks when we decided to shoot it. No boom. No lights. No knowledge. The material is funny. Real funny actually. I think a 27 min finished product. With a small music video at the end. It should keep me busy for a while. But, then I won't have to do anymore gangsta rap vids...for a while.

Rolex24

My first hired gig. This is the commercial for the 20 min weekend wrap up that I'm working on now. So far, the biggest challenge is the bad audio. God, I'd give my left nut for wireless mics! Good thing I'm already done with that nut anyway. So I am writing a voice over narration for the whole thing. Heather will do her breathy British voice, and I've got some beautiful pictures to tell the story with. But anyway...here's the commercial.

First short done.

It's done. On dvd in all its glory. All its glitches. All the missed lighting opportunities. The small serendipity moments that made up for all the short comings of having such a small crew and so little experience and knowledge. But I can say, it's done. I know I could edit it forever. Reshoot scenes I failed to light. Reperform voiceover. Record folley. But, honestly, I'm sick of this project - working on it anyway. I think that's normal. I wrote the story in 1998 as a short for freshman creative writing. Dusted it off and revised it during my short MFA stint. Made it great. Failed making my first short last year. But in the past year I've been determined to produce something - to learn - to see a story, a string of words and sounds and encrypted images come alive before my eyes - and eventually the eyes of others. Watering Stones always has been the story I've previsualized most. Sure, it could use some touches...but one day, I'll look back at this short and wonder how the hell I pulled it off...knowing little if anything about actual production, having little if anything besides a great story, determination, and a few great friends to guide me through, and an awesome wife to kick me in the ass whenever I doubted myself. (not to mention awesome kids! - as seen in the film). I don't often lift my creations up with confidence like this...but that's just another thing I better get used to doing...because if I can't...who the hell will. Thanks to all that inspired this effort...you all know who you are.